It goes without saying, but breakups are never easy. One method of recovery is to seek distraction in movies, TV, and video games, but it’s important to be selective with our media when it comes to post-breakup escapism. Depending on what stage in the grieving process you’re at (has it been days, months, or years?), the wrong film might trigger unwanted emotions, dredge up bad memories, or set you back on the recovery timeline.
But the right film can actually aid us when it comes to moving on. Whether by helping us to see a failed relationship in a new and clearer light, or by asking us to take ourselves a little less seriously, the 20 movies on this list will help you to get over your ex. Different temperaments will, of course, respond differently to many of the films below, so we’ve tried to cover a wide range of post-breakup media. Let’s dive in.
20 La La Land (2016)
La La Land may seem a strange choice considering its bittersweet tear-jerker of an ending, but it contains an important life lesson: sometimes, two lovers’ lives diverge, and that’s okay. There’s no harm in wondering what could have been. It may even be part of the grieving process. But be sure to hold off on this one while your wounds are still tender (unless you’re okay going through two boxes of tissues as you watch).
19 Blue Valentine (2010)
Blue Valentine is a classic of the “failed relationship” subgenre of drama. Starring Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams, its nonlinear story bounces back and forth between the early stages of a relationship and its eventual dissolution. The film’s juxtaposition of joy with loss can be shattering, so be ready to cry, cry, and cry some more. Gosling and Williams are majestic, and director Derek Cianfrance pulls no punches when it comes to his depiction of marital misery, per The New York Times. Best case scenario: you come away from this one with a fuller understanding of what to avoid when it comes to relationships.
18 Her (2013)
Ah, Her — the gorgeously sad artificial intelligence love story from Spike Jonze. This is one to watch when the breakup wounds are still fresh, as it has a lot to say about the messy process of moving on and adapting to change. Through your inevitable tears, you’ll come to see the world in a different, AI-tinged light. Plus, we’re living through a kind of artificial intelligence revolution right now, making this a timely choice. We may not be able to relate to falling in love with a robotic voice assistant, but we can certainly appreciate Jonze’s vision of the all-important connections we form, and sometimes break, with others.
17 Free Solo (2018)
Free Solo chronicles master rock climber Alex Honnold’s dream to free solo the daunting, 3000-ft high El Capitan rock formation in Yosemite National Park. So, how does this documentary relate to being newly single? Well, it shows what’s possible when you tackle life on your own. Honnold sets everything aside in order to achieve his dreams, including relationships. You need not be a death-defying mountain climber to appreciate the message here, which applies to anyone and everyone trying to harness the freedom of being newly single.
16 Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind imagines a world where people can literally erase all memory of their exes. Although it’s difficult to imagine a better method of getting over a breakup, the film complicates the issue by showcasing some of the unforeseen consequences of its memory-erasing technology. What happens, for example, if we happen to reconnect with the very person we’ve forced out of our memory? What if they find us? Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind explores these and other questions, and becomes the quintessential breakup movie in the process.
15 Rosemary’s Baby (1968)
Rosemary’s Baby: a wildly influential horror masterpiece and a warning to be careful who you trust (yes, even if it’s your spouse). Director Roman Polanski shows the dark—or darkest—side of marriage and childbirth. Perhaps, the lesson goes, trust should never be freely given. After all, you never know who might be a high-ranking member of a Satanic cult. You can’t really know a person, Polanski reminds us, until you know a person. This is the kind of film you turn to when you feel like relationships as a whole aren’t worth the trouble.
14 Gone Girl (2014)
With Gone Girl, director David Fincher created a monstrous portrait of “love” gone wrong. Watching it after a breakup serves two purposes. First, if you’ve got hard feelings towards your ex, you can take comfort in knowing that they (probably) weren’t as bad as Nick or Amy Dunne. And second, you’ll realize that, if you stay single, you’ll be safe from the kind of relationship horrors depicted in this film.
13 On the Beach at Night Alone (2017)
As its title suggests, Hong Sang-soo’s On the Beach at Night Alone is a film for the solitary romantic in all of us. We follow Young-hee, an actress, as she reckons with her tenuous relationship with a married, and much older man. Alone, she begins to see her tumultuous love life with greater clarity—and the film may help us to do the same. Being alone, Hong Sang-soo hints, gives us a chance to reflect on who we really are.
12 Personal Shopper (2016)
Behind its subdued art house veneer, Personal Shopper is a fairly straightforward ghost story. Are you haunted by memories of your ex? Then you might benefit from this film’s vision of grief, loss, and the sometimes excruciating process of letting go. You should be ready for a few scares along the way, but horror is not the focus here. Kristen Stewart stars as Maureen Cartwright, a practicing medium whose recently deceased brother may or may not be communicating with her from beyond the grave.
11 Lost in Translation (2003)
At its core, Lost in Translation is not about finding new and unexpected love in Japan, but rather the fleeting nature of all human connections. We may lose what we’ve found in a flash; it’s up to us to decide whether it’s better to have love and lost than never to have loved at all (as Tennyson put it). If you’re recovering from a breakup, Lost in Translation will hurt in all the right ways. It may also give you that nudge to go out into the world and forge new connections. You don’t have to be in Tokyo to do so.
10 Marriage Story (2019)
Marriage Story might be better titled “Divorce Story,” as that’s the subject at hand. You can watch its grueling depiction of divorce (the yelling matches in particular) and feel grateful that you’re not in a similar predicament. If you are, or have been, in a similar predicament, consider skipping this one until the wounds are less fresh. Stellar performances by Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson make it feel like you’re watching a real couple break down onscreen.
9 A Separation (2011)
If you haven’t heard of A Separation, you can think of it like an Iranian Marriage Story, though it is actually eight years older than Noah Baumbach’s divorce drama. Per The Hollywood Reporter, this celebrated picture won the Academy Award for Best Foreign Language Film in 2012, but we think its leads should have been up for Best Actor and Best Actress as well. The acting is the highlight here, and nowhere will you find a more realistic depiction of a couple on the rocks. With a child involved, the film becomes quite complicated indeed, but it may help heartbroken viewers to feel seen.
8 Marcel the Shell with Shoes On (2021)
Beneath its wildly cute shell (pun intended), Marcel the Shell with Shoes On is an emotional gut punch of a film. Though not by any means a movie about dating or breakups, it has plenty to say about handling loss, and especially the loss of loved ones. The documentary filmmaker who discovers Marcel is a recent divorcee, and he (and the audience) learn much from this tiny shell-creature’s unique approach to life.
7 The Banshees of Inisherin (2022)
The Banshees of Inisherin is a dark comic-drama about the sudden end of a friendship. Taking place on a small isle off the coast of Ireland, the fallout from this friend-breakup is felt by the entire town. Losing your significant other means losing a close friend, and many of us will relate to Pádraic Súilleabháin’s (played by Colin Farrell) difficulty in letting go of the past.
6 Annie Hall (1977)
Woody Allen’s masterpiece Annie Hall is the greatest romantic comedy of the 1970s. Starring Allen himself as Alvy Singer and Diane Keaton as Annie Hall, it offers perhaps the finest investigation of a failed relationship ever put to screen. We may see parts of ourselves realized in both Hall and Singer, who, despite their best efforts, simply can’t make it work. The film is filled with poignant lines about relationships and the ways that we remember (or misremember) them when they have ended.
5 The Piano Teacher (2001)
Micheal Haneke’s The Piano Teacher offers a damning vision of love gone horribly, violently, corrosively wrong. If you manage to make it through the film — its more brutal scenes make for a challenging watch — you might find yourself swearing off relationships for good. Though ostensibly about a piano professor, the film has more to say about paraphilia than music, though here sexual repression gives way to violence and abuse.
4 Right Now, Wrong Then (2015)
Right Now, Wrong Then is really two films in one. The first part tells the story of a potential relationship that flounders, while the second part shows what happens if everything goes right. Going through a recent heartbreak? Then you’ll likely relate more to the first part; but the appeal of the film is its diptych structure, which turns the fantasy of “what could have been” into a second reality. On its own, this fantasy would seem to be mere wish fulfillment. However, when placed next to a failed version of the same chance meeting, it becomes a stirring commentary on the contingent nature of all relationships.
3 Brief Encounter (1945)
The aptly titled Brief Encounter may be a love story, but it’s one that ends almost as soon as it begins. Viewers may find echoes of their own short-lived romances in this gorgeously sad black-and-white classic from director David Lean. Ultimately, it teaches us that all “encounters” are but brief; when it comes to love, endings always come too soon. Though the film centers on an extramarital relationship, it does not (as some movies do) defend infidelity. Instead, it simply steps back and observes.
2 Audition (1999)
Feeling wronged by a disloyal ex? Takeshi Miike has you covered. His 1999 horror film Audition is one of the great revenge thrillers of our time. Squeamish viewers should steer clear, as its explosion into violence is extreme. For others, and especially the jilted among us, it may afford a strange form of catharsis. Though some would argue that it falls squarely in the “torture porn” sub-subgenre of horror, it has a lot more going for it than sheer shock value.
1 Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010)
Scott Pilgrim vs. the World became a pop-cultural phenomenon in the year of its release. Based on the comic book of the same name, it follows Scott Pilgrim’s video game-style quest to defeat his new girlfriend Ramona Flowers’s seven evil exes. Whether you identify most with Scott, Ramona, or the evil exes, this film makes for a perfect comfort watch if you’re going through a breakup of your own. It’s just unserious enough to be fun rather than ridiculous, and poignant enough to make us reflect on the ever-daunting task of leaving the past behind.