Stephen Colbert was in a good mood on Wednesday’s episode of “The Late Show,” thanks to Democrat Raphael Warnock’s victory over Republican Herschel Walker in the Georgia US Senate. Runoff election Tuesday.
And to celebrate, Colbert dusted off some jokes he had written for the show back on Election Day (Nov. 8) but didn’t get to tell because the race between Warnock and Walker was forced to a runoff. it was done.
Colbert said off the bat, “I’m glad, because with the election over, I get a chance to use the jokes I wrote a month ago.” He was then given an extremely dusty envelope, sealed with wax (get it? Because it’s old?) that contained the jokes.
“Warnock has won Georgia, and it’s fitting that he’s a reverend, because when I hear that all I can think is, ‘Thank God,'” the first quipped.
“It’s been a tough break for Walker,” Colbert said as he read the second joke, “though it will take him a few days to understand what’s happened.”
“With this loss, Walker is expected to return to his previous job, lying about previous jobs,” Colbert continued. The third joke, of course, refers to some of Walker’s many, many lies. “But on the bright side, it gives her more time to spend with her family, and to find out who she is.”
Colbert then continued with some new material. “An interesting wrinkle is that Walker was hand-picked by the former president,” Colbert said, referring to Donald Trump, “against the advice of everyone who met with Herschel Walker. He did what went against his master’s core belief: he accepted reality.
Colbert was referring to Walker’s speech after the loss. Walker did not actually say the words “I accept”, nor did he greet Warnock or even take his name. But he basically accepted his loss and urged his supporters to accept it as well.
Colbert played a portion of Walker’s concession speech when he told supporters, “We are all winners.” “It’s true, Herschel. In some ways we’re all winners,” Colbert replied. “Not in this way. That’s how you lose. But in other ways we’re winners.”
“And,” Colbert continued, “in celebration of your winning and losing, we’re going to send you this beautiful trophy: ‘World’s Most Dad.’ Of course, this was a reference to Warnock’s many secret children and the many lies she told him about them.
“So a bad night for Herschel Walker, but a great night for Raphael Warnock, who had to win 5 elections in the last 2 years,” Colbert said. Colbert then played a clip of Warnock’s victory speech, where he said in part, “After a hard fought campaign, or should I say campaign, I have the honor to utter the four most powerful words ever spoken in a democracy.” Is.”
“We have meat?” Colbert quipped.
Warnock says “The People Have Speak” in the actual clip, in case you’re curious.
Colbert said Warnock’s victory was another blow to Donald Trump. “The night before last, the major candidates he supported in Nevada, Arizona, Pennsylvania, New Hampshire and Michigan all lost,” he said.
Colbert then noted how some GOP insiders argue that “Georgia may be remembered as the state that broke Trump once and for all.”
“Yeah! Georgia broke it,” Colbert said. “Or as I just texted everyone on my phone, peach emoji, fist emoji.”
There’s more, and you can watch the entire monologue above now.