Stephen Colbert got a whole lot of wishing on Thursday night, courtesy of “What We Do in the Shadows” star Harvey Guillen, and actually some jokes about serial liar/Congressman George Santos.
Of course you know where this is going. Ever since Santos became a figure of national interest last December – you know, after being exposed as a grifter, con artist and serial liar – common agreement Among the people taking note is that if Guillén portrayed Santos, he would absolutely kill it.
We’re happy to report that the consensus wasn’t wrong, and Guillen delivered a fun 5 minutes of funny jokes mocking the Long Island Republican’s many, many, many lies.
The premise of the gag is that Colbert somehow conducted an interview with the Congressman, which was being piped in via satellite from a hallway in the House of Representatives. From there, it was basically just Colbert playing the greatest hits of Santos’ Deception, and Guillén living them all up.
The bit began with a simple acknowledgment of how much Santos lies, with Guillén-Santos claiming that he has been a guest on “The Late Show” 5 times. “And I was also your band leader, Jon Batiste,” ‘Santos’ said, mispronouncing the name, “Batista.”
Asked to explain all the lies he had told, Guillén’s Santos said, “What to explain? Everything I have said is the truth. My name is George Anthony DeVolder Santos Kitara Zebrescu John Jacob Jingleheimer Cellino and Barnes isn’t. And yes, Guillen sang that last one.
He touched on the story that Santos used to be one of the first to publicly criticize drag queens. He touched on her false claims of having attended both NYU and Baruch. He then touched on Santos’s claims of being the beginning of volleyball – Guillén being terrible at the game and shouting “Touchdown!”
“Another victory for Hogwarts,” said Santos of Guillén.
When pressed about Santos’ fake charity, Guillén’s Santos tries to promote another fake charity, “gimmieyourmoney.net”, which sadly is not a real website. Then, IRL was pressed about Santos’ false claims about his mother – he claimed she died on 9/11, then she died sometime later, but from causes not related to 9/11, and finally She died in 2016 – Guillén’s Santos pretended to attend his mother’s funeral at the time.
“Do you know how hard it is to lose someone when they’ve already died three times?” Santos of Guillen demanded.
You can see the complete, delightful sketch at the top of the page. And here’s hoping “The Late Show” brings Guillen back sometime soon.